So we have had the builders in. They turned up predictably early. Unlike your stereotypical craftsman, one of the two turned down a cup of tea. However, his colleague did have a coffee, with enough sugar to cause an onset of diabetes.

To be fair to them, they were both very nice and friendly. They kept themselves to themselves and only disturbed us to say that they were turning the water off, and to say “hello” to Roman, who had clocked their presence and was jumping up at the bars of his pen, like a puppy with ADHD. He’s like that with people, as believes every visitor to the house is carrying hundreds of rabbit treats in their pockets.

The pair of builders did disappear around midday, presumably to some secret event in deepest, darkest Mordor, which only working class tradesmen know about. Claire and I were left intructions on how to deal with a delivery of shower parts, being made to our house. When the courier did arrive, he was more than a little peeved that they had scarpered.

Later this afternoon, with the builders back in the bathroom, I was having a relaxing hour with Claire, despite the sounds of hammering and sawing from upstairs. Claire was playing her Nintendo, while I enjoyed an audiobook. Our peace was suddenly disturbed when we heard a loud scream from upstairs. We feared the worse – somebody must have lost a limb. Moments later, we heard laughter. I don’t know what was going on, but as I write this blog, I have just had the disturbing thought that they could have seen a huge spider – a huge spider, which is still at large on the first floor of the house.

The builders left at four, promising that they would return in the morning. I bloody hope so! They’ve left the bathroom like this…