You’ll see I am yet to write anything new on my blog, since I attended surgery.

This is because having an operation on a major limb, becomes very traumatic and tiring – affecting the patient both physically and mentally.

Preparing to go under

• My first post-surgery blog, was always written pre-op and simply scheduled for publishing.
• Therefore, some of the predictions in the blog, were just that. Predictions. For example – the type of anaesthetic, to be used…
• I was under the impression that a general anaesthetic was the favoured and preferred approach. I had psychologically prepared myself to be knocked-out – safe in the knowledge, that I would be  unaware of anything related to the procedure, until I woke up. Ignorance is bliss.
• I was therefore scared and underprepared, when, upon arrival in theatre, I was told that the operation would take place without any feelings below the waist, all while being fully awake.
• In preparation for the operation, I was injected with a strong sedative, called ketamine. I had only heard of this drug twice before – once when the local ‘Bobby’ visited my school, to tell us what drugs are bad, really bad, or really really bad. In case you didn’t know, ‘Bobby’ is slang for police officer and not drug dealer.
• The tranqualiser is also given, by Hannibal Lecter, to all-round nasty chump, Mason Verger, who is then encouraged to cut off his own face or nose – depending on whether you’re watching the movie or tv series version of the storyline – before feeding his resulting handywork to his dogs or self. Again, this all depends on if you’re watching the movie or TV version of Hannibal – or reading the book!
• I didn’t react well to the ketamine. By this, I mean that the drug did the job exactly as the anaesthetist intended. I was petrified, but I was distracted from what was going on, with regards to my operation.
• I remember warning everyone in the operating theatre, that I had seen Hannibal, and therefore knew what they were up to. I was told how a needle would be stuck into my back – to which I started laughing hysterically, telling the anaesthetist “nooo, you’re not going to!”.
• I also recall asking if my pet bunny would have been given the same medication, when he was castrated. Maybe this was the most unusual enquiry that I could have made – especially as I was yet to be injected with anything, at that point, so my mental state remained unaffected.

I like to be in control of my body and thoughts. It’s one of the reasons I rarely got drunk in my twenties, whereas many friends of mine would hit the pubs and clubs at least twice a week, without fail. That and the fact, alcohol usually made me vomit, way before I became close to any drunken shenanigans.

By this point, the effects of the ketamine were in full swing, with other pain killers and potions, working their way around my body.

But that’s for another post…