Do you ever wonder why all the bad things happen to you?

I’m not going to suggest that I am the only person to experience hurt and turmoil, but nobody could say that I haven’t had more than my fair share of excrement.

The reason why I have not updated my blog until now, is because I have been, and continue to remain, in hospital. Yes, that old chestnut.

The Accident 

The accident occurred on Monday morning.

You know those awful news stories, where some poor soul is attacked, or suffers a terrible event yards from their home? That was me.

I wasn’t assaulted, although it could certainly be argued that I was attacked – in this case, by the concrete pavement.

I had set off on the short scooter ride to work, when at the bottom of the path leading to my house, things went a bit mad…

While I am unable to recall all the events, leading from me being sat on the scooter, to being thrown onto the freezing cold floor, I am certain that I was initially riding at a safe speed. I remember the realisation that I had lost control of the mobility vehicle. Seconds later, I was lying stricken in the street.

I knew instantly that I had caused serious damage to myself. As anyone who has previously broken a bone will confirm – you know you’re in trouble. You can feel the multiple pieces of limb under your skin – weak and unstable, where it was once a single, strong bone which you would simply take for granted and never think about.

My right leg was a mess. My left leg felt damaged too. I knew for certain that I had broken both of my arms.

Trust me, the red stuff isn’t tomato ketchup.

I screamed and screamed for my wife, Claire; who just moments earlier, I had kissed goodbye. From martial bliss to hell and pain, in a matter of seconds

Claire, who hadn’t had time to close the front door after my departure, heard my shrieks of pain and fear, and came running to my aid.

I could tell from my dear wife’s reaction that I was in a very bad way. No wife becomes hysterically upset if their husband simply grazes his knee!

I cannot remember how long it took for the ambulance to arrive. It may have been 15 minutes, or over an hour. However long it took, it was too long.

As I lay on the freezing ground, unable to move, concerned neighbours offered whatever help they could. Claire rang everyone who needed to know, including both our managers, to inform them that we would not be in work for a long time.

The ambulance finally arrived and I couldn’t be more relieved to see the paramedics, who may as well have been white knights, riding in on horseback to rescue me.

The knights had to cut my new winter jacket, in order to access my poor shattered limbs. Luckily, my coat wasn’t too expensive – however, it was stuffed with duck down.

As a result, white feathers covered the path where I lay. I was later informed that I had been bleeding from a wound sustained on my head and around my right eye socket. I can only imagine how the street would have looked, after I eventually left the gruesome scene in the ambulance. Unknowing locals must have wondered what great white bird had been slayed and by what creature.

Safely aboard the ambulance, the blue flashing lights were turned on, with the driver bypassing the local hospital altogether, and heading straight for Bristol and Souuthmead. This was going to be serious…

I will continue to update my blog, detailing what happened next. As I remain in hospital, with limited use of just one hand, these updates may not be as frequent as I would like.