The weather has been great the last few days; it is finally starting to look and feel like June and not a damp, cold autumn morning. I’m making the most of it by enjoying the outdoors when I am not at work as it is sure to rain over the weekend with this typical and predictable weather.
With summer weather brings an increase in sea gulls. These are vicious little buggers, on my way back from work as I walk through the car park I can see them all standing on buildings and lamp posts. It’s like a scene from a Hitchcock movie. They have flown down from buildings squawking at me and do look threatening at times. I just know one of them will shit on me one day!
How I would love to sit out in my garden with a rifle shooting them out of the sky. Unfortunately this would probably attract the interest of a police helicopter which is not good!
The gull problem seems to be a lot worse in Bath City Centre which is where most of the birds probably come from. The council have taken measures to get rid of the vermin but it doesn’t really seem to be working, tourists seem to be a major factor to this. These tourists come to Bath for a nice holiday, they don’t have to live here. They see the gulls, think they’re cool and feed them. Cheers for that Mr. Tourist, you can leave after your holiday but residents here have to live alongside these vicious animals!
Anyway, that’s enough of that rant, time for something funny – unless you’re a Man U fan! Malcolm Glazer is really causing havoc at Old Trafford – what a shame! He has just recently put his two sons on the board. His sons whose only previous knowledge of football (or soccer) is watching ESPN and now if tabloid papers are to be believed, Manchester United legend Sir Bobby Charlton is going to be kicked off his position on the committee.
P45 for Bobby!
It’s all going wrong and is only a matter of time before the big name players start to leave and Major League Soccer players join The Red Devils! This is of course hilarious for football fans across the world who do not support Man Utd, it just makes you want to laugh out loud!
Vanessa, what a stupid daft cow! She contributes nothing to Big Brother 6 and never speaks. When she does finally open her gob however she breaks the most vital and obvious rule of Big Brother DO NOT DISCUSS NOMINATIONS. Doh!
She casually told Lesley that she would be voting for Sam. Now I know Sam is as thick as two short plants and just sits around giggling, but the rules are there for a reason.
Big Brother picked up on this act of disobedience and has therefore put all the housemates up for nomination. Even though Vanessa caused all this I urge you all, keep her in! We have another chance to vote out Craig! He wanders about all day mouthing off in his overly camp voice speaking total, utter shite about how everyone he has ever met is despicable. This housemate is horrible and has to go, vote him out…. Now.
Earlier on this week I ordered myself one of these electronic fly killer toys you can buy from gadget stores. I’ve used it last night to “take out” two moths which had invaded my bedroom totally uninvited. It worked. I now have two dead moths in my carpet (any moths, butterflies or caterpillars reading, the funeral is for next Tuesday at 2pm).
The thing that is bugging me (excuse the pun!) is I keep wondering how powerful this device actually is! The curious and twisted part of me wants to touch the metal part of the zapper and press the switch while the chicken and Marty McFly part of me is just too damn scared to do so!
Thinking of the scale of the shock, I don’t know if we are talking on the same as those tiny electric oven lighters, in which case it’s nothing scary or is it as nasty as those electric fences that farmers use to keep their cows in line and Ken Bates wanted to install at Chelsea. Maybe it’s as bad as police stunner guns – I seriously doubt it!
The level headed part of me says as it can be bought legally, without a licence and as a novelty, for a human being the shock would be just an unpleasant sensation (or a nice sensation if you’re sick and twisted) and nothing of any harm.
It really does make me wonder though what it actually feels like. Shame I’m too scared to touch it. Anybody who has had experience with one of these, send me an e-mail and let me know what it was like and how brave or stupid you are.
The majority of the Big Brother viewers haven’t changed from last year; they’re still voting out the best characters and leaving the annoying twats inside the house.
Mary was voted out on Friday night leaving Big Blubber Craig in the house for at least another week. It was a shame to see Mary leave as she was entertaining and unlike most housemates was tolerable.
The next housemate I would like to see leave is Vanessa. Who the hell is she? She sits around all day doing absolutely nothing. She doesn’t even speak! Pointless housemate who sits back, smiles, is everybody’s best mate and will probably be in the house for the final week – typical.
Friday night I went to see The League of Gentlemen movie. In the past TV series to film adoptions have been generally poor, with the exception of the excellent South Park Movie.
While The League of Gentlemen Apocalypse was nothing superb it certainly didn’t disgrace itself and more than made up for the horrible third television series. Most of the favourite characters were there, Tubbs & Edward, Geoff, Hilary Briss, Pauline. The only classic characters missing were The Dentons which was a shame.
The plot of the film is highly original and is not what you would expect. In the past television to movie adaptions have seen the whole cast all travel on an aeroplane to sunny Spain with predictable results. This film is different, the characters escape from the fictional town of Royston Vasey and track down the show’s creators Jeremy Dyson, Mark Gatiss, Steve Pemberton and Reece Shearsmith to “gently” persuade them to continue with the series.
I recommend this film to any League of Gentlemen or comedy fan. Watch out for cameos from Peter Kay and Simon Pegg.
Lastly football shirts. I ordered two the other week both of which arrived on Friday, the first one being the new Leeds United shirt for the upcoming season. I’ll be honest, I don’t like it. The colours don’t look right and to wear it feels like the Navy Away Kit from the disastrous 2003/4 Season. That was the away kit where Leeds only managed to pick up 1 point wearing all season. Hopefully next season will not be the same!
The second kit I ordered is a bit of a novelty and I only really bought because it was on sale, the Harchester United kit from the excellent Sky One football series Dream Team. A friend of mine claims it is a Monkees Football Shirt on the principal that it is based on a made-for-TV football team and the Monkees were a made-for-TV pop band.
All the housemates in the Big Brother house are freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaks!
The housemates have been in the Big Brother house for nearly a week now and all I can say is that it is better they are in the house and out of society.
This week has been all about Makosi who was the “Unlucky 13th Housemate” and was given the task of pissing the housemates off to gain the most nominations. The thick cow failed to grasp the task and indeed the whole principal of Big Brother rules for the last five years! After a large number of attempts by Big Brother to teach Makosi the simplest of tasks she eventually managed to understand what she had to do.
She succeeded and after a number of days of acting like a Queen Biatch managed to get the most nominations from the other housemates. Therefore in passing the task was given the choice of which two housemates she would like so see face the public vote. This is where Makosi showed that her head may not just contain a hamster running about in a wheel but maybe, just maybe a tiny amount of intelligence….
Makosi chose to put Craig up for eviction. Craig is the fat, loud mouthed, overly camp,
I have nothing against Mary, she is a good housemate who is honest and is not afraid to speak her mind, especially to Saskia who is shallower than a children’s paddling pool. I urge you all, vote for Craig to leave then he can piss off back to his hair salon, eat his pies and cut hair.
About Me
So you stumbled across my blog. No doubt after searching for something bizarre on Google. Before you hit that 'Back Button', why not stay and have a read for a few minutes?
If you are after a website which gives advice on how to hack an iPhone X, download the latest Steven Seagal movie, or view nudy ladies, you've come to the wrong place and may now press 'Back'.
However, if you would like a lifestyle blog, written by a 30-something chap, living in Bath (England), feast your eyes on this.
You won't discover how to copy PlayStation 4 games. What you will find is a blog, covering life in the West Country, the highs and lows of supporting two unsuccessful football teams, while sharing a house with a wife and rabbit.
All written by a man, somewhere on the sanity-scale between normal and eccentric.
