It’s late in the evening. In 12 hours time I will be in the car travelling to The Millennium Stadium in Cardiff. This time tomorrow I will be home and know whether Leeds United will be in The Premier League or in the Championship next season. Will it be Chelsea or Colchester? Liverpool or Luton? Newcastle or Norwich?
I’ve been excited all day and the tension is getting worse. I don’t know if I’ll be able to sleep tonight! If the stress continues to grow, I’ll be shitting like a new born baby come the morning.
I’m so excited, this is one of the biggest, if not the biggest moments in my time supporting Leeds and I can’t wait! C’mon The Whites!
A funny joke I heard yesterday…
A South African gold miner loses his leg in a mining accident and is sat in hospital talking to his mate.
“Well that’s me fucked, who on earth’s going to want a one legged gold digger?”
His mate replies “Well, you could try Paul McCartney”
This evening I went to The Riverside pub in Saltford (just outside of Bath) for a colleague’s birthday.
As we were eating out I chose Hunters Chicken, basically chicken, bacon and a cheesy BBQ sauce – a dish which The Globe Inn, just down the road from The Riverside makes beautifully. While it was tasty, it wasn’t as good as The Globe’s recipe.
After food had been consumed some black guy started putting up big speakers, getting out records and setting up a sound system. I thought he was going to be the DJ for the evening, playing the whole back catalogue of the NOW THAT’S WHAT I CALL MUSIC series, something I have heard before and didn’t really want to hear again tonight.
I was wrong. The man was actually a proper entertainer and spent the whole evening signing some favourite classics. He was very talented and was well worth staying in the pub drinking Fosters until 11.30pm for.
The singer, who I believe is known as Ravel, opened the set with an excellent rendition of Wonderful World by the late, great Louis Armstrong (for the uneducated, this song is the theme tune for the BBC1 TV series A Life of Grime). Some more of his performances which I thought were very good included Neil Diamond – Sweet Caroline and Monkees- I’m a Believer.
Towards the end of the evening, some bloke who had obviously had one too many Bacardi Breezers started staggering around the room begging women to dance with him. When they turned him down he started begging the men. Needless to say nobody wanted to dance with a pissed, bald, sweaty twat. He didn’t take the hint and returned to the same people every time Ravel started a new song. Luckily before too long The Riverside Security got wind of this twat’s behaviour and took him out the back for a good kicking (or maybe just asked him nicely to leave).
This evening marked the start of a three day weekend for me. I have booked Monday off work to follow the Play Off Final on Sunday. Monday I will either be jubilant or deeply depressed and lying in bed all day with the lights off. It all depends upon the result.
Big Brother is back. I don’t know which series they’re up to now, is it the 78th? It certainly feels like that.
The show is like a one legged woman hopping down the high street. You know that you shouldn’t watch but you can’t help but take a look.
I must admit I have watched every series, even though I haven’t always made it to the end. Normally I find that by the final week any character with a shred of decency and entertainment has been kicked out so that some high pitched, annoying, hair dresser can win.
This grassman in the BB house will probably have more personality than most of the contestants
I don’t know who will be surrendering their dignity and entering the house tonight, however I do hear that some of the tabloid papers have leaked details of the contestants, although not being a masochist I avoid The Sun and News of the World.
You can almost predict which fools will enter the house tonight though…
They’ll be a man, who will boast that he is the biggest bitch anybody has ever seen. He will say that he doesn’t give a fuck what people say to or think of him. This contestant is normally brought to a blubbering wreck when a housemate he secretly fancies ignores him and cops off with the fit blonde.
There’s always some fit, tall blonde. She’ll promise to get her tits out but when inside the house will remain more covered up than a Nun in a straightjacket. One night she’ll get steaming drunk after consuming two glasses of wine, strip off in the rain and stick a banana in every hole available. She’ll then regret the whole thing in the morning (and for the rest of her life).
There’s always a 55 year old accountant who only really went on the show so that he could “learn about the youth of today” and “teach Britain’s future a thing or two about class and decency”. He’ll end up going to bed at 7pm and weeping in the Diary Room.
Other predictable guesses for housemates include…
– An asylum seeker
– A university lecturer who hates asylum seekers
– A lager lout who promises (in his own words) to “bone all da birds” and make the house wild.
– An overly-camp hairdresser
– A stripper
– An admin assistant
– A homosexual
– Somebody who hates homosexuals and wants them all shot.
We’ll wait and see, I bet most of my guesses are correct!
A message to Arsenal fans everywhere. “So sorry you didn’t win tonight, well played guys and thank you for an enjoyable match.” :o(
It was a shame that the whole game appeared to be marred by the sending off of goalkeeper Jens Lehmann. However I seriously hope that the Arsenal fans, who are normally gracious in defeat, do not focus on this incident and let it overshadow the cup final.
I am sure even the most loyal Gooner would admit that Jens did wrong. What was the referee to do with only a second to make a decision? Send him off or award a goal? I think either decision would have been justified. Let us not forget the Chelsea fans last season who moaned to buggery when the OPPOSITE decision was made in The Champions League game against Liverpool (the goal was awarded and Chelsea kept 11 men). If Arsenal are to blame anybody they should blame Jens Lehmann for making a schoolboy error, although bear in mind he’s been a good player for them.
Thierry Henry was kicked about by Barca players who should have been booked but on the other side of the coin Emmanuel Eboue blatantly dived to award Arsenal a free kick which lead to their goal. Swings and roundabouts. I challenge any Gooner to honestly tell me that they would not feel aggrieved had Barca scored in the same manner.
It was a big shame an English team was unable to win The Champions League this year and I know that I like Barcelona but as I blogged earlier this evening I was rooting for Arsenal.
Overall a good game of football but I think Barca had a slight edge. I have watched both Arsenal and Barca in domestic and European games this season. Both of whom have had some impressive mathces. Barca however have a special spark Arsenal are lacking at the moment. Hopefully Arsenal can find their own magic soon.
Sorry Gooners, best of luck next year – glad you got 4th spot!
Oh and well done to Barca, you were impressive this evening (clap, clap, clap).
About Me
So you stumbled across my blog. No doubt after searching for something bizarre on Google. Before you hit that 'Back Button', why not stay and have a read for a few minutes?
If you are after a website which gives advice on how to hack an iPhone X, download the latest Steven Seagal movie, or view nudy ladies, you've come to the wrong place and may now press 'Back'.
However, if you would like a lifestyle blog, written by a 30-something chap, living in Bath (England), feast your eyes on this.
You won't discover how to copy PlayStation 4 games. What you will find is a blog, covering life in the West Country, the highs and lows of supporting two unsuccessful football teams, while sharing a house with a wife and rabbit.
All written by a man, somewhere on the sanity-scale between normal and eccentric.
