Following last nights visit to the ground, I have conducted a list…
– Their stewards don’t let you take cameras into the stadium. Get a grip! It’s a non-league football ground, not Area 51! Let the fans take photos of each other enjoying themselves. As I’m a rebel, I ignored the stewards’ request and took photos anyway… at fulltime, when I was leaving anyway. I’m such a bad ass.
– Their manager, a rather large Steve Evans, spent the whole match pacing up and down the touchline, shouting abuse at the Bath City players, his own players, the referee and just about anything else that holds an existence on the planet. His bad manners and girth were so great, they made Sam Allardyce look like Ghandi.
– I’ve seen a lot of embarrassing half time pleas for support at football games. Delia Smith’s infamous rant in 2005 being one of these. I also remember someone grabbing the microphone at Truro City and singing Eye of the Tiger during the break. Last night, Crawley’s tannoy bloke surpassed all of these on the cringeworthy-scale. At half time, with the home side winning 2-0, a booming south east accent came thundering through the speakers. “THERE’S AN OLD MAN THAT LIVES BEHIND THE STADIUM AND HAS MADE A COMPLAINT!” the Bath City fans stared at each other, stunned “HE SAYS THERES TOO MUCH NOISE GOING ON AND WE NEED TO QUIETEN DOWN!” at this point, even the Crawley fans were embarrassed. “SO LET’S MAKE THE OLD GIT EVEN MORE ANNOYED AND MAKE SOME NOOOOISSSSEEEE!” I was embarrassed for them.
– Crawley Town seem to have found a lot of pennies somewhere underneath the sofa and have been spending lots of money on new players. Never has a song “went for the money” been more appropriate *. One of the non-league prima donnas, Sergio Torres, acted like a typical overpaid footballer and dived for a penalty. Cheat. The game ended 2-1. Had the stolen penalty not been awarded, Bath City would have drawn the match.
* Fair play to their goalkeeper, though. When asked by the travelling Bath City supporters how much he was being paid, he replied, grinning, “a lot!”
– The journey home. OK, not exactly the fault of Crawley Town Football Club, but as we’re having a moan, I may as well blame them for this too. As we came into Bath at 00:40, police stopped the coach. London Road had been closed following an accident and we had to take a huge diversion to Lansdown. I was not in my bed until 1.30am. Never was I more pleased that I had taken today off work as annual leave.
There are other reasons to dislike the club, but it is past my bedtime and unfortunately I have work in the morning. To find out the other 96 reasons, visit the football club yourself. However, I will not be held responsible for any emotional distress or loss of life caused during your visit. Oh, and don’t bring your camera… unless you’re proper hardcore, like me.
6 Responses to “101 reasons to dislike Crawley Town FC”
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So you stumbled across my blog. No doubt after searching for something bizarre on Google. Before you hit that 'Back Button', why not stay and have a read for a few minutes?
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Goatman
August 26, 2010 - 1:47 amEye of the Tiger at Truro – lol! Something in the air in Cornwall..
Cailan
January 31, 2011 - 7:29 pmOi mate.. before you go insulting us you might wanna look
at your own team, if we’re so bad then why are we in the 5th round
of the FA cup tied to Man Utd? come up with an answer to that
asshole!
Sean
February 1, 2011 - 12:20 pmMy guess would be spending more money than the whole of the
League Two teams put together. Reading your comment, it seems you
have picked up the manners of your manager as well.
lawrence
May 3, 2011 - 6:18 pm“look at your own team”? what have bath city done exactly? you don’t explain. also, he wasn’t saying crawley are a bad team, he’s just highlighting what a disgrace you are to the english leagues and football in general.
Ryan
February 10, 2011 - 12:31 pmSean, your a twat. Football is all about money these days, why don’t you rant about man city? Because your a cunt and pick on small teams, Glad our manager gave you abuse! XXX
louis smith
February 10, 2011 - 12:36 pmfuck off u cunt