I recently posted my thoughts on the comparison between the UK handling of a COVID-19 lockdown with that of Spain’s.

This blog’s Spanish correspondent – my sister, who is currently living over there – has told me that during the last week or so, the lockdown rules have been relaxed.

You’ll never guess what those lucky Spaniards can do now…

If you have a child or a dog, you may now take it out for a walk! Otherwise, you must continue to remain locked up at home – unless you need visit the local supermercado. This is allowed… once a week.

The UK have been a lot stricter…

It has banned sunbathing! I know. That shocked me too. It is just like living in Nazi Germany.

Sunbathing is something our Mediterranean pals reminisce about, like a 95 year old trying to remember the Blitz.

No wonder we as a nation are suffering so much with this virus.

Boris Johnson has apparently said that the country has reached its peak.

This “reached its peak” thing has confused me. I have come to the conclusion that either I am being incredibly thick, by not understanding how this has been calculated; or Boris is being incredibly thick, for assuming this is as bad as things are going to get.

Either way, I find it totally irresponsible for someone in such power to make such a statement. He may as well have told us all to vaccinate ourselves, by drinking a bottle of bleach.

There will be millions of people who will take it as an invitation to break lockdown (if they aren’t doing so already) and socialise with friends – all while listening to Things Can Only Get Better by D:Ream at full volume.

Some good news! Where the UK fails in implementing and enforcing a safe, sensible lockdown, it makes up for in novelty charity records.

I bet Spain don’t have a song involving a singing lump of starch.

Seriously, this a great song and raises money for an excellent cause. So buy it. It’s cheaper than a bag of chips.

I read how the recent daily death toll from COVID-19 has dropped. I still find the numbers disgusting high, but made my feelings on that matter perfectly clear yesterday.

While any reduction in fatalities is positive, I am concerned that people will get complacent and see this an excuse to return to normality. Claire told me how #lockdownends was trending on Twitter.

At the time of blogging, ‘Lenient Lockdown’ is still very much in place. I call it that because of the comparison between how the British authorities handle those who break the rules, compared to the Spanish…

British Police: “Excuse me, chaps. Sorry to interrupt your picnic, but I really must ask you to return homes… please… once you’ve finished your scotch egg, of course.”

Policia Español: “¡Vete a la mierda, malditos coños! De lo contrario, mi perro te matará!”

The Spanish police are far more efficient than our PC Plum. They are also a lot more crude. If you don’t speak Spanish and wish to know what is written above, translators are available online – but probably best not to ask Alexa to tell you, especially while little Timmy is in earshot!

Along with the #lockdownends trend, I have also read suggestions that our government may easing restrictions. For fucks sake…

This news is being celebrated (not by me). Ironically, those rejoicing the most are the individuals disobeying lockdown, anyway!

There were absolutely loads of people enjoying the hills and fields behind our house, yesterday. This included some large groups, of which I would be surprised if they all lived in the same household.

Any budding entrepreneur, hoping to cash in on the pandemic, should park an ice cream van in one of the fields. There is a killing to be made there – sadly, quite literally.

The road separating our garden from the fields was also incredibly busy with traffic. I thought that driving was only permitted in the event of the journey being essential. That’s a lot of essential travel!

Claire even spotted two cars stop and park, only for a female passenger to get out of one vehicle and enter the other. Where do you even begin to justify that?

All this was happening very close to midday. If I was to be sceptical, I would say that a lot of people were going out for Sunday lunch. Roast chicken, Yorkshire pudding, potatoes, veg and a generous portion of COVID-19. De-lic-ious!

Our neighbours are just as bad. I refer to the family I have blogged about many times before. They park their many vehicles without consideration for others, let their annoying dog run wild and put their own excess rubbish in other residents’ wheely-bins.

Yesterday afternoon, they made numerous trips to their two cars, with the entire family in tow. They even received visitors of their own – visitors they had no hesitation in inviting into their home. I guess what they lack in common sense, they make up for in manners to their in-laws.

I have reached the point where I can no longer be concerned for those who break lockdown rules. We have all been made aware of the dangers of contracting the virus and have been told to remain at home.

I think of those people in the same way I do smokers. With pity. Of course, I want them to live a long and healthy life, remaining disease-free. But we all know that smoking over 20 fags a day will never end well. I cannot worry for smokers, as I cannot change their ways.

It is the same with those who are ignoring lockdown. The more they mix with people from outside of their homes, the greater the risk of catching the deadly virus.

The major difference between smokers and the lockdown law-breakers, is that apart from second-hand smoke (a lot less common since 2007), smokers are only putting themselves at risk.

You don’t need me to explain how contracting and passing on COVID-19 works. Suffice to say, the individuals who decide to break lockdown and go for a Sunday stroll with friends, may not develop any symptoms of the virus themselves. This isn’t to say that they will not play a major role in transmitting the killer bug to others, who have chosen to remain at home.

The BBC have reported that between Friday and Saturday, 813 patients died from the COVID-19 virus.

Just let that settle in for a moment…

• EIGHT HUNDRED and THIRTEEN people dead.
• EIGHT HUNDRED and THIRTEEN grieving families.
• EIGHT HUNDRED and THIRTEEN funerals.
• All in just TWENTY FOUR hours.

Only four weeks ago, 813 fatalities in a day, from a single virus, would be worldwide news and a national tragedy.

I don’t deny that people are still very concerned by the current pandemic and are aware of the vast numbers of victims who are dying as a result.

However, I am picking up vibes that the shock of mortality figures and even empathy towards the deceased, is diminishing.

This is very sad. A death from COVID-19 on Sunday 26th April, is just as tragic as one on Thursday 26th March. However, it doesn’t feel like the general population are as upset by it.

We are only human and it is in our nature to become psychologically immune to repetitive  trauma. It would be difficult for even the most emphatic of individuals, to maintain the same level of grief day after day.

This is wrong. Very wrong. I am not blaming the British public – like I have already mentioned, it is natural to become immune to bad news.

We should be horrified. Why do so many continue to die? I know that vaccines are being developed, but even without a miracle cure, surely it is possible to reduce the number of deaths?

The government has extended the lockdown. Is this enough? We all know many people are breaking the rules. Should the authorities be doing more to enforce these regulations?

How are people contracting the virus? Surely it is possible to investigate this, with a view to increasing lockdown laws and punishing those who break them?

What concerns me, is that if anything, these rules are going to be relaxed. I would call that madness, but what do I know? It’s not like I’m important, like the US President…

I am sure that along with the rest of the world, you will have heard of Donald Trump’s latest advice on how to deal with COVID-19… use cleaning products as a form of medication.

THE MORNING DRUG ROUND AT TRUMP TOWERS HOSPITAL.

Despite having an IQ equal to that of a daddy long-legs, the fool has somehow found himself in the most powerful position in the world.

I have heard that America is the land of opportunity, but didn’t expect a man better suited responding to requests for “cleanup on aisle 3”, to be President of the United States.

The most concerning thing about his theory, is that there will be people, who at the slightest hint of a cough, will chug a bottle Toilet Duck, or hook Domestos up to their veins.

Trump has since claimed that his comments were sarcastic, backpedaling faster than Bradley Wiggins. Here is a video of this clarification. YouTube are yet to introduce a smelly-vision feature to their website, but I can confirm that it is possible to smell bullshit while watching the clip.

If anyone is in any doubt as to what sarcasm actually is, refer to Father Jack Hackett…