The weather has been horrendously hot of late.

Despite having enough fans in our bedroom to make it feel like we are in a wind tunnel, we both struggle to sleep due to the extreme heat.

I have therefore hit a new low. I have began fantasising over old headlines from the Daily Express newspaper.

I’m not after the stories of how immigrants are to blame for all our problems – from Freddo Frog chocolate bars going up by five pence, to the sky being too blue.

I want to read their infamous weather warnings. Tales to terrify the elderly into never leaving their homes between the months of September and June, for fear of polar bears.

Promises of temperatures colder than Mars. Advice to leave our freezer doors open to keep warm.

We all know it’s rubbish, but right now these headlines look divine. If only they were true…

BBC weather had better be right on this…

If I fail to see any flashes in the sky, or hear rumbles apparently coming from the clouds, I will probably be so angry, that I will utilise all my rage against incorrect weather forecasts to create my own electrical storm.

Courtesy of Seans Stories.com

You’re welcome.

Oh great…

I think I’ll just have to crawl into the fridge and hide tomorrow…

This weather is disgusting. No other word for it.

The only way in which the weatherman can make amends for this insufferable heat, is to follow up on his promise of thunderstorms.